If you want to rip some of the loudest, longest, and smelliest farts ever then you’ve come to the right place. The average person farts up to 20 times per day which is about about 1.5 liters of gas.
That’s nothing to “sniff at” but if you want to fart way more than “average” then read on! With these surprising tips you can blow these stats out of the water.
Eat some dried apricots
Eat a few handfuls of dried apricots and you will be farting up a storm. And trust us, these will be some of the longest and deepest farts you have ever ripped. They will also smell worse than hot garbage. Need proof? Take a listen to this 7 second dried apricot fueled fart.
Add Nopalina to a glass of water
Mix 2 tablespoons of Nopalia in some water and wait for the fireworks to start. But be warned, if this is your first time trying Nopalina make sure you are close to the toilet just in case your fart turns out to be more than just a fart! This fiber supplement is great if you are constipated but will have you farting in no time!
If you are lacking fiber in your diet Nopalina is something you should try because it will really get things moving. But trust us, if it feels like a fart don’t force it or you will be in for a big surprise.
Drink a protein shake
Protein shakes are notorious for creating some of the most noxious gas known to man! Sometimes when I’m at the gym and see a fit hottie downing a protein shake I can’t help but imagine the havoc it is wrecking on her digestive system! Put 2 scoops in milk and wait for the fun to start!
Protein shakes can make you fart so much due to the sugar alcohols, lactose ( if you mix it in milk), and the protein itself which can cause rotten egg smelling farts.
Eat broccoli
There is just something about broccoli that make me fart more than I thought was humanly possible. So if you want to fart alot give broccoli a try. Of course your mileage may vary, but for me if I make a quick stir fry with broccoli or add 5 or 6 crowns to my salad I can clear out a room in no time.
Take 5-HTP
The supplement 5-HTP is known for helping people feel better. It reduces stress and anxiety and gives you an overall feeling of good well being. It will also make you fart. Alot!
Eat sugar-free gummi bears
Sugar free gummi bears are our #1 food for making you fart. These tasty little candies will have you farting more than you can imagine. Don’t believe us checkout the reviews on Amazon. In addition to the gas these can also induce sharts so be careful!
Seriously after eating 2 handfuls you will easily be ripping 5-7 second farts. Ha ha!
Drink Topo Chico
I love Topo Chico, it tastes great but it has tons of bubbles from the carbon dioxide that makes it sparkle and fizz. All that gas has to go somewhere after you drink it. So drink a bottle down quickly and do your best not to burp. That gas will be coming out of your other end before you know it!
So there you have it. Want to fart more than you thought possible? Try some of the items on this list and fart away! And you have to admit…few things in life are more satisfying than ripping a good fart!
Eat beans,beans, and more beans
Beans are notorious for making you fart and for good reason. They will make you fart. If you want to take your farting to the next level soybeans aka edamame are the worst offender. After than try navy beans and pinto beans. These contain the high amounts of oligosaccharide which is a sugar that your body is unable to digest.
Let the pressure build
When you feel the urge to fart….don’t! Fight the urge to fart and let the pressure build up over the next few hours before finally releasing the gas. It’s the same reason that morning farts can sometimes be HUGE. The fart has had time to marinate in your gut and gain strength!
Push fart out with some force
Push out the fart with a bit of force. Be careful with this one though because if you push too hard you might get more than you bargained for! The tightness of the sphincter muscles is a major factor in the sound of the fart. So practice farting with different levels of pressure and slightly clenching your butt cheeks.
Chew gum
When you chew gum you will inadvertently swallow air. Many Some gum also has artificial sweeteners such as sorbitol which can also make you gassy.
Good luck on your journey to impress your friends, family and coworkers by farting louder, longer and smellier! With practice and dedication who knows, you might just become the best farter ever!
Fart Sound Gallery
These are some of the loudest and longest farts you will ever hear! 100% real.
Triple Fart {{svg_share_icon}}5886More Than a Fart {{svg_share_icon}}6332Good Rip {{svg_share_icon}}3477That One Stank! {{svg_share_icon}}3392Solid Fart {{svg_share_icon}}2388twizzler sugar free fart {{svg_share_icon}}1414
Chewbacca fart had me cracking up. I accidentally came upon this page looking for 5htp fart remedy lol.
let er’ rip bois.
Lol how did I end up here?
Apricots make me scare myself with the noises coming out of my body.
Topo Chico makes me fart something fierce!